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Between The Covers

There are dozens of riddles embedded in Ulysses. The only as-yet unsolved one is the identity of "the man in the macintosh".

Never progressed beyond John Grisham, yet would like to be seen as a person of literary taste? Here are primers on three great classics which hardly anyone has ever read. Memorise this stuff and walk tall in the culture vulture circuit. Totally foolproof. Trust us, we know.

Ulysses / James Joyce


Story: How Leopold Bloom, wife Molly, and young man Stephen Dedalus spend June 16, 1904. Nothing much happens, but Bloom has sex with Molly in the last chapter.Appear knowledgeable: Leopold, Molly and Stephen correspond to Ulysses, Penelope and Telemachus in Homer’s Odyssey.

Ultra-knowledgeable: On June 16, 1904, James Joyce had his first date with Nora Barnacle, his lifelong companion.

Absurdly knowledgeable: There are dozens of riddles embedded in Ulysses. The only as-yet unsolved one is the identity of the "man in the macintosh".

Throwaway one-liner: "A remarkable conflation of mythology, symbolism, philosophy, realism, and humanity."

War And peace/Leo Tolstoy


Story: Napoleon attacks Russia. Hundreds of characters fall in love, brood about life’s meaning, die fighting, or survive and continue brooding.

Appear knowledgeable: Trigger off arguments by mentioning General Kutuzov’s belief that wars are won only through "patience and time".

Ultra-knowledgeable: Tolstoy originally intended War and Peace to be merely the first part of a trilogy. Good lord!

Absurdly knowledgeable: In War and Peace, Tolstoy recommends the use of calculus to study history.

Throwaway one-liner: "The contrast between the universal yet delusive experiences of free will and historical determinism reflects an inner conflict within Tolstoy."

Remembrance of things past/ Marcel Proust


Story: A man’s fanatically detailed memories of watching idle rich Frenchmen and women party, gossip, sleep around, waste time.

Appear knowledgeable: By telling people they should refer to the novel as In Search of Lost Time, the correct translation of the French title.

Ultra-knowledgeable: Proust rewrote just the novel’s first page 12 times. Things Past is 3,000 pages long.

Absurdly knowledgeable: Proust was gay, and partially modelled Marcel’s lady love, Albertine, on his lover and chauffeur Alfred Agostinelli.

Throwaway one-liner: "Ostensibly about the irrevocability of time, it’s actually about intemporality."

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