1. “I’m funny, right? What do you know? You’re a door. You only like knock-knock jokes.” - Chandler Bing
2. “Hi, I’m Chandler. I make jokes when I’m uncomfortable.” - Chandler Bing
3. “I’m a gym member. I try to go four times a week, but I’ve missed the last twelve hundred times.” - Chandler Bing
4. “I’m not great at advice. Can I interest you in a sarcastic comment?” - Chandler Bing
5. “If I were a guy and…did I just say ‘if I were a guy?’” - Chandler Bing
6. “Could we be more white trash?” - Chandler Bing
7. “I tend to keep talking until somebody stops me.” - Chandler Bing
8. “What must it be like not to be crippled by fear and self-loathing?” - Chandler Bing
9. “When I first meet somebody it’s usually panic, anxiety, and a great deal of sweating.” - Chandler Bing
10. “I can handle this. “Handle” is my middle name. Actually, “handle” is the middle of my first name.” - Chandler Bing
11. “I say more dumb things before 9am than most people say all day.” - Chandler Bing
12.“When I was younger, I started using humor as a defense mechanism.” - Chandler Bing
13. “So it seems like this internet thing is here to stay.” - Chandler Bing
14. “I’m hopeless and awkward and desperate for love!” - Chandler Bing
15. “It’s always better to lie than to have the complicated discussion.”- Chandler Bing