Stickily Yours, Velcro Manager

• Your flattest organisation has just two layers: brands and commodities. So, the upward rise is tougher and longer. Climbing Mt Everest without O2 is easier.
  
• People have personal yogis to manicure minds and personal soothsayers to decipher the future. But none of them can offer you the ultimate career recipe. You require a brand druid to brew your future.
  
• You can make an impression on your boss only in increments. He may like a PowerPoint presentation on market dominance with King Kong backgrounds since he's a movie freak. Or he may like the sound of verbs like "tee off" because he's a habitue of the greens.
  
• You may create a Sistine Chapel in the organisation but unless somebody creates a blog-type buzz around it, it may turn out to be a Christmas decoration.
  
• You may suddenly realise that standing-up-for-others isn't a virtue anymore. Maybe, you need a brand manager to tell you the PUTs (plain urban truths) of corporate life.
  
• You may need to develop a mental algorithm which tells you when to keep a high profile and when to sound dumb. Bosses love human failings; what they really hate is flawless threats.
  
• Bosses don't wipe their slates. So a mistake in 1995, when you first joined the organisation, may figure in your 360-degree performance appraisal in 2006.
  
•  Multi-tasking is a test. Bosses spring it on you to gauge your maturity. It only works at home; in office, it makes you look like a hands-off baby-sitter.

If you think these questions have provoked the commodity in you, then start looking for a VM. Typically, potential VMs are natural game-theorists and can provide multiple outcomes. They are brand-killers, since their idea of pushing you is based on pulling down somebody.

But even as you get a VM, search for an OS as well. They are inseparable. Nowadays, it's fashionable to have an OS, or office spouse. It's another window to your future. You don't need to have an affair to have an office spouse, you just need to exchange sympathies. After all, the modern office is like a cutting-edge trench in which you relentlessly duck to perform. When the tasks are too much to handle, you need an emotional reboot. You need your dear office spouse.

As 2006 gets going, remember blue ice. It means you could be knocked out when you least expect it. So, start a blog and find your own VM and OS if you don't have the courage to find them in person. Alternately, find an OS and let her help you find a VM. And please create a relationship, not an affair.

In short, in 2006, think like a brand. Don't ogle like a commodity.