Mixed Shots

Honest Like A Thief

Feel like the end of the world is imminent and scrounging for a ray of hope? Well, here’s a story to restore your faith in humanity. When V. Suresh Kumar’s motorcycle was stolen, little did he expect it would turn up in the mail a few days later—sent by the very man who took it. But that’s what happened. Prashanth, who worked in a tea shop nearby, had taken the bike to return to his hometown Mannargudi, about 240 km away, with his wife and children. He took the dire step as he did not have any work during the lockdown. He returned the bike later and Suresh withdrew his police complaint. If only the Italian classic Bicycle Thieves had ended this way!

Break The Nut Rut?

It seems the pandemic is making people go nuts. And in some places, coconuts. Representatives of the Mannai Telugu Chettiar community approached the Madras High Court to stop the tradition of breaking coconuts on devotees’ heads during the Aadi festival at Mahalakshmi Amman temple in Karur. The court, however, refused to interfere in religious customs and dismissed the plea. Looks like the age-old practice is safe for now. The skulls of the faithful? Not so much.

Better Safe Than Unmagnified

When the coronavirus’ depredations go down in the annals of history, among its sartorial casualties will be a 167-year-old tradition—railways’ TTEs wearing smart coats and ties to check passengers’ tickets. Ticket inspectors now have to wear gloves, masks and protective gear on duty. Lest the pesky virus hitches onto a ticket that the TTE examines, the railways has instructed them to carry magnifying glasses to view them from a distance. So if you think you see Sherlock Holmes dressed as an alien on a train, resist the urge to say, “Elementary, my dear Watson!” And pray that the train does not lose its way on the tracks and land up in another state.

Full Trot, Quarantino

It must have been a pleasurable ride along mountains, just a man and his horse in a steady gallop. Until COVID-19 played spoilsport. They were on their way to Rajouri district from Kashmir Valley when officials stopped them and sent the man to quarantine. They were wondering what to do with the horse until they came up with the perfect solution—why, send the horse to quarantine too! Officials of the animal husbandry department had to take the “extreme measures” as the man and his stead came from a red zone. Now that the J&K administration is turning luxury hotels around the Dal Lake into paid quarantine facilities, we wonder if the quarantined horse will have its day or neigh.

Dubai, Do Buy, Do Bye

I t was the worst of times, it was the best of times—worst for the world and best for an Indian businessman in the UAE. The 36-year-old is reported to have swindled 50 people by making bulk purchases of goods worth $1.6 million with post-dated cheques that eventually bounced. By then, however, he had escaped to Hyderabad on a repatriation flight. His grand loot? Face masks, hand sanitisers, gloves, rice, nuts, tuna, pistachios, saffron, French fries, mozzarella cheese, frozen Indian beef and tahini. News of grand feasts is yet to trickle in, but perhaps he was just stocking up for the mandatory quarantine after arrival in India. 

Brevis

Illustrations: Saahil; Text by G.C. Shekhar, Naseer Ganai, Syed Saad Ahmed and Alka Gupta