"HI! Mah name’s Muffin and I’m your waitress," say blondes with maple syrup-dripping voices greeting people entering diners in the US. In Delhi, at the All-American Diner at the India Habitat Centre, you get a kitschy statue of Marilyn Monroe holding down a flyaway skirt. Next, a BLT—bacon, lettuce and tomato—sandwich gets grilled into a limp oily mess, blaspheming the original, a salad in fresh bread.