Gulliver's Travails

Six-feet-plus does not seem very tall, certainly not when you look at Westerners. In fact, even in India, the average Punjabi or Jat is of a pretty big build and the lanky Big B is a superstar. But these people are still towering exceptions and worse, the average height supposedly decreases as you travel south, so cities below the Vindhyas cater very little to the occasional tall person. And if the person is 6’10" or 7’, he might as well be a Gulliver in Lilliput. Maybe that’s why it took three exasperated people from a tiny town called Kunnamkulam in the depths of Kerala to start a Tall Men Association. Or TMA, in short.

The three, P. Zechariah Joseph, P.I. Jose, and Jinny Ipe Tholath, long-time pals whose heights are 6’3", 6’2" and 6’1" respectively, found that each time they met, they had some common woes to exchange. And of these, the most irksome, which would be hilarious if it weren’t so obviously a source of great discomfort to them, is what they face in Kerala’s public buses. The seats are partially open below at the back and each time they sit behind a woman, they find their knees pretty firmly jammed against the woman’s posterior. Not quite what you would call sitting pretty, this has made them the butt of many a scathing remark. Avoiding it requires a lot of dextrous manoeuvring, including folding up legs three-and-quarter times at an angle of 45 degrees. And if that was not enough, public hoardings and notice boards are placed so low that they are in constant danger of decapitation. Tired of all the gymnastics they have to perform to just fit in at public places, they decided to get together and form a club where the least they do is exchange their sorrows and the most, petition various public bodies to do something to accommodate tall people.

That’s how TMA was started in January 1999, and the faithful continue to meet about five times a year at a quaint old hotel in Kunnamkulam. A tradition that is obviously familiar to the locals, who stand around and watch patiently as the troupe of lofty gentlemen strides in for the mandatory cups of chaya, this time with a diminutive reporter in their wake. Later, as we walk down to the local basketball court with Joseph, the enthusiastic 61-year-old founder-president of TMA, I notice that his feet barely fit his chappals. It’s not just footwear, readymade shirts, trousers, vests and raincoats are also tough to net.

These people might be too big for their boots but clearly they haven’t lost their sense of humour. Says Joseph: "My biggest problem as a tall person is that I cannot bluff my way out of weddings by saying, I was there, you just didn’t notice me." The height is big trouble at cinema halls and auditoriums too, and the guys try their best to get seats right at the back—they don’t want to be hissed at throughout the performance.

But if you think the TMA is just some tall people making a mountain out of a molehill, think again. Joseph spills from his bag a pile of postcards, from Solapur, Sahibabad, Varanasi, Delhi, Eloor and a host of other Indian towns, addressed rather touchingly to just ‘The President, Tall Men Association, Kunnamkulam, Kerala’.The mail has reached Joseph all right, all from prospective members, tall people (6 feet is the minimum height qualification for the TMA) who find themselves misfits in a short society. Today, TMA, registered under the Charitable Societies Act and with a membership fee of Rs 200, boasts of a 800-strong squad from all over India. The tallest member, Durga Prasad from Andhra Pradesh, is 7’2" while Delhi’s Sharad Kulkarni (7’1") and Sanjot (6’7") are the tallest couple.

In 2000, the TMA contingent won the district-level award for best contingent at the Republic Day parade. More importantly, in 2000 and 2001, the club petitioned the Kerala High Court to redesign public transport vehicles. So far the jurists, presumably much shorter than the TMA members, have not heard the pleas. Meanwhile, a TMA ‘Security Agency’ has come up in Chalakkudy. "This is a valuable source of employment for our members," says Joseph, and the clients are suitably impressed.

Then there’s the marriage bureau, to look for matches. Evidently, finding a suitable mate continues to be a big problem. Says Joseph: "My family hunted for six years before I got a—5’6"—bride.". Tall, dark and handsome might be every woman’s dream but what if it’s the woman who’s tall? B. Lalithambika, TMA’s only single woman member, is just over six feet and works as a data entry operator near Thiruvananthapuram. People, with their usual mix of curiosity and insensitivity, keep staring at her on the streets and her family despairs of finding a husband for her. Most of them, though, take their unusual position very much in stride. Says 30-year-old V.N. Ajayakumar, 6’2": "Throughout school life I was consigned to the back benches. (But) I really enjoyed myself." As can be expected, many of the tall ones excel in basketball. Plus, they can change light bulbs with ease and outstare goons. Well, what else? Says P.I. Jose: "Most women want tall men, we are definitely not complaining."