Love Me Tinder!

ASaturday night at home. Beer, banter and conversation. The gossip  veers, as it often does, towards my friends’ Tinder escapades. One tells the tale of how a man she went on a date once turned out to be a tantra-practising pseudo-yogi. Seemed alright in his profile, she says. But he actually fainted in the middle of the date.

Let me admit, barring the little fun I’ve had with my friends’ Tinder accounts—mostly swiping left every profile that popped up—I’ve never actually been on Tinder. The horror stories apart (the tantric-yogi tale is perhaps one of the tamest), I’m put off by the effort it takes to make an appealing profile. And yet there’s no denying that Tinder has taken over young India by storm (one of the biggest markets, clocking over 14 million swipes each day). With an easy interface that auto-picks photos from Facebook and lets you pick tabs that show your interests—music, books, virtual-reality games, whatever—putting yourself out there has never been easier. Of course, many call it a “hook-up” app and a lousy way to start relationships. This, after all, is a society where dating and premarital relationships are still discussed more in terms of  ‘Are you okay with it?’ rather than ‘How do you go about it?’

Dating apps shout a break from this boxed-in binary, catering to the young Indian who’s looking for more than a well-set marriage. For many, relationships no longer unfold in a pre-decided manner as they used to, nor is marriage always the ultimate goal of dating—experience is. Tinder gives you the freedom to choose who you want to meet—which many would have experienced before—while also giving the act a sense of mystery. Even for the more conservative, the internet does not disappoint—there are a score of new apps that “guarantee” love and marriage. True, Tinder may not be the safest place to be in, but then which place is safe? To be able to set one’s own rules for a date, or maybe a one-night stand, is perhaps all you could wish for.