Silicon Gully Sops

Every south Indian festival season provides a grand opportunity for us ‘Madrasis’ to judge how national our TV channels really are. The early part of the year illustrates this the best. First comes the harvest festival Makara Sankranthi in Andhra Pradesh and Karnataka. It is also the fortnight of the Tamil new year Pongal. Together, the three states can only mean three letters for our idiot boxers: trps. After peddling pathetic pap all year, this is a chance to re-establish diplomatic relations with ‘Silicon Gully’. So, what would our TV honchos do this time? Would those sobs (sons of babus) wish us like they do on Holi and Raksha Bandhan and other half-cock festivals? Would those power-dressing pouts which sport badges for aids day—not for TB, not for dengue but for aids!—wear something nice and Indian? We waited and watched to see if the South would be on the minds of DD and Zee and Sony and Star when software and soft-state aren’t in theirs. We weren’t. Admittedly, we don’t need a circular from GK-II to tell us that Ugadi or Onam is around the corner. And, sure, these festivals are regional, but ‘ayyo! amma!’ do we have any national festivals left when political correctness has killed Diwali too?