Family and societal unacceptance persist in heteronormative relationships that ignore conservative dictates of caste and class. But in the case of couples that do not subscribe to heteronormative gender roles, the road to acceptance has been riven with inequality and discrimination.
The Supreme Court of India decriminalized homosexuality in 2018. At the time, many from the LGBTQIA community saw it as a step in the right direction. Four years since, not many in the community remain optimistic as many within the community continue to face not only social but also physical discrimination.
Choosing one's own partner has always officially been a loaded question in India. In the case of LGBTQIA couples, the question becomes even heavier. In thge case of an LGBT couple, the added layer of individual discrimination from the time they come out (or are outed), seeps into every aspect of their lives, making it difficult to find not just social acceptance but quality accommodation, employment, and the cultural right to be who they are.
The path of same sex love, and persons belonging to non-confirming gender identities is not only riven with legal loopholes but also the distinct lack of social constructs.
At the outset of the Supreme Court observation on Wednesday which issued a notice to move the two petitions seeking recognition of same-sex marriage from the Delhi High Court to the apex court, Outlook looks at six heartbreaking stories of queer couples from the recent past, reflective of the varying degrees of the abuse, the othering and even fatal endings that these couples have faced.
The lucky
Adhila Nasarin and Fathima Noora made news this year when the two were reunited by a Kerala court after their parents had forcibly separated them. They recently did a wedding photo shoot, both women posing as brides. Noora and Nasarin received sanction from the Kerala high court to be together, but they do not have the privileges or rights of a married couple in India. The high school sweethearts say their families still believe that their relationship is a passing phase.
Another young gay couple, Subhankar Roy and Virat De from Kolkata, eloped and sought refuge at a secret hideout in 2019 after their parents in Barasat allegedly threatened them with honour killing.
The couple's families allegedly tortured, abused and dragged them to attend a kangaroo court by locals and relatives, who ruled against their union. The couple has lodged a complaint against their parents with Barasat police. “My father told me that he would take a loan to hire a contract killer to get us murdered,” said Subhankar.
The two had met on a social networking platform and soon Virat moved into Subhankar’s home. But when the latter's parents discovered the relationship, the couple was abused, and Virat was asked to leave the house. Subhankar’s mother Barnali rubbished the allegations of torture made by her son. “My son is always welcome but the door is closed forever for Virat, whom we had treated like our son for the last one year.” Soma Roy, a relative of Subhankar and one of the attendees of the kangaroo court, claimed the couple was neither threatened nor beaten up, but just "told to behave like normal human beings".
The unlucky
In November 2022, a lesbian couple Murshidabad, West Bengal, was brutally beaten by three men, who burnt one of the girl's private parts with an electric rod and tried to rape them. Family members of the victim have registered a case against three people at Sagardighi police station. As per the report, two of the accused are relative of one of the victims. Whereas, the third accused is her neighbor. The police have already arrested two of the accused whereas one of the accused is still absconding. The police is searching the third accused.
In June 2018, a lesbian couple jumped to their deaths in Gujarat's Sabarmati river, not before throwing in a child belonging to one of them and leaving behind 'suicide notes'. The deceased Asha Thakor, 30, and 28-year-old Bhavna Thakor, 28, had scribbled on a parapet wall near the Sabarmati river with red lipstick, "We have left this world to live with each other. The world did not allow us to stay together. We did not have any men with us."
Another similarly scribbled message was found on a disposable plate nearby: "This world did not allow us to stay together. When will we meet again? When will we meet.. perhaps in the next birth we will meet again."
Yet, a Gujarat police official told the press: "The two women committed suicide due to complications arising out of their lesbian relationship."
Eerily similar is the case of Roshini Tandel and Rujukta Gawand in 2016, both 21 years old, from Mumbai's Chunabhatti area. But here, the former died and the latter survived. The two friends from the same neighbourhood, fell in love and began dating when soon, the bubble burst when a relative of Rujukta's saw her "cuddling" with Roshni at Marine Drive. The relative tattled on the girls to Rujukta's father, who runs a fast food joint.
Upon interrogation from her father, Rujukta confessed that she was in a relationship with Roshini. This did not sit well with the family. She was forbidden from meeting Roshni. Moreover, her father summoned Roshni and her sister to a local political worker's office to "discuss the matter". Here, Gawand verbally abused Roshni and threatened her to stay away from his daughter.
While they argued, Rujukta attempted suicide by drinking phenyl. Assuming the worst, Roshni went home, locked herself in her room, and the next day, was found hanging from the ceiling.
Rujukta had survived the suicide attempt. The police booked Rujukta's father and the local politician, Mahendra Nagte, at whose place the meeting took place, under IPC Sections 306 (abetment of suicide), 507 (criminal intimidation) and 34 (common intention).
Retaliation from the othered
In March 2018, a 21-year-old Rashmi Rana and her lesbian partner Nisha Gautama from Ghaziabad allegedly bashed the former's mother to death for objecting to their relationship. On March 9, Rashmi Rana's father Satish Kumar lodged an FIR at Kavi Nagar police station against his daughter and her teacher Nisha for battering his wife Pushpa Devi with an iron rod which killed her. Police arrested Rana and Gautama from Ghaziabad railway station. During interrogation, Rana confessed that her mother opposed the union and constantly tortured her over it. Fed up with the objections, Rana and her teacher killed the mother.
