After the polls people's first thoughts were, thank God, at last we are movingtowards a two- party system. Their second thought was, ahem— are we? After the polls,newspaper reports made strange reading.
RSS said: " NDA won the polls because of RSS ." "Didn't Vajpayeealso play a role?" murmured the press. "Just because Vajpayee keeps a picture ofMahatma Gandhi behind him when addressing the nation on TV means nothing," RSS saidcoldly. "He is part of RSS !"
"Rot, neither Vajpayee nor RSS played any part," said Mulayam Singh angrily." NDA won because of Congress."
"Never mind why NDA won," said Sakshi Maharaj. "Mulayam won because ofme."
"Of course," said Mulayam quickly. "That's why we welcome SakshiMaharaj into our party!" "Er... What happened to the Babri Masjid issue?"the press wondered aloud. "Mulayam defended Babri, Sakshi demol ished it!"
"I didn't even touch the mosque," Sakshi protested. "I merely stoodnext to the mosque and watched RSS hoodlums demol- ish it! Now my mission in life is toexpose anti- nationals like Vajpayee, Advani, Rajju Bhaiya and Ashok Singhal!"
"We will unite the backwards of five Hindi- speaking states," said Mulayam.
"We will make Mulayam our PM," echoed Sakshi. "Couldn't these twounite before the demolition?" a Muslim muttered bitterly. "I don'tknow why the NDA won," Sharad Pawar said.
"I know why the Congress lost. It lost because Sonia expelled us!"
"But you have joined Sonia in Maharashtra," the press com- plained."Before the polls your party said you would be against both the Congress and the BJP!"
"We said that we would remain equidistant from both," Sangma corrected."We remain equidistant. Our party is with Congress in Maharashtra and with BJP inMeghalaya! Isn't that equidistant?"
"But you said your party would shun Congress if Sonia tried to become PM!"the press said. "Now as leader of the Opposition in Parliament, she is in line forthe job!"
"Their party has nothing to do with us in Parliament," Sonia said haughtily."We have merely accepted them in distant Maharashtra! Delhi has nothing in commonwith Mumbai!"
"That's right," everybody shouted. "We all believe infederalism!"
So where do we go from here? A two- party system? A one- party system? Or a no- partysystem? Some people have started saying that India needs a new party. Others say a newsystem.
Polls make
Odd pairs,
Just to take
A few chairs!
