I’ve been performing the year-end review ritual for more years than I care to remember. Not only am I fatigued, the ritual too is fatigued. The fixed format consists of compiling a laundry list of the good, the bad and the ugly. Add to this combustible cocktail the defining event/s of the preceding year, and you have the requisite 900 words. There is a catch, though. Supposing the defining events of the aforementioned 12 months turn out to be duds, false alarms?
Take 2009. We thought that the Satyam scandal would seriously shake international confidence in our prestigious and profitable software industry. (Our software industry continues to be a cash cow and is still universally admired.) We thought Varun Gandhi’s hate speeches would communalise the general election. (Nothing of that sort happened, no communal incidents took place.) We thought the stockmarket, having crashed, would never recover, leading scores of investors to suicide and the country to financial ruin. (The Sensex is currently buoyant and might soon hit 20000). We thought that the world’s first pandemic this century, swine flu, would result in mass fatalities. (The pandemic has blown away, less than 200 people in India died.) We thought the expulsion of Jaswant Singh for writing a provocative but boring book would mean disaster for the bjp and its extinction as a serious political formation. (After some hiccups, a fresh, young, eager team is in place; Mr Advani is very much around, and wonder of wonders, there is talk of Mr Jaswant Singh going “home”). We thought the entry of Barack Obama into the White House would usher in a brave, new world with the United States mending its ways. (President Obama is doing terribly and Uncle Sam, as visible in Copenhagen, has not changed his stripes.)
The lesson to be drawn from all these contradictions and paradoxes is, a) people like
me who put together profound pieces analysing the last 365 days should avoid reading the rubbish they wrote the previous year; b) things simply are not what they seem to be when they first occur.
| Another year-end Nothing quite momentous about 2009. Thank God. |
In fact, 2009, as surveyed at its fag-end, does not seem to offer one momentous event (like 26/11 in 2008) but has delivered a series of small explosions, small mutinies, small disappointments and small satisfactions. (Gay sex between consenting adults has been decriminalised, Supreme Court judges have been forced to list their assets.) Of course, for the author of a year-end scan, a solitary India-shattering happening is most handy. He can then write some apoplectic prose as he predicts a swift end of hope and optimism. I am not complaining. For the absence of really bad news, one must sincerely thank 2009. Our lonely planet, despite climate change ayatollahs, appears in no imminent danger of imploding.
Happily, we’ve had some entertaining diversions. A journalist called Jarnail Singh tossed a shoe at Union home minister P. Chidambaram. The shoe missed its mark, but managed to achieve favourable results: two of the 1984 riot accused were denied tickets. However, it must be noted that the doomsayers were proved wrong once again—they had predicted a rash of shoe-throwing at our already harassed rulers. Mercifully, no similar protest directed at a minister was registered in 2009. Sometimes it is useful to have a large number of barefoot citizens!
Given my sunny disposition, I think I should spread some year-end cheer. A nationwide opinion poll conducted by Outlook brings joyful tidings. It reveals that the magnificent masala dosa is India’s national dish, with the juicy rosogolla emerging as India’s national dessert. Both delicacies were comfortable winners. The abominable butter chicken was not even a contender, and we did not include the execrable chicken tikka masala (which is the national dish of a certain uncivilised country) in our list of options.
As an alert pseudo-secularist, I am particularly delighted that a staple treat from the South has finally received pan-Indian recognition. It is more evidence of our syncretic culture.
Editor and I wish you a happy and safe 2010.
