Currency Copter, Money Monsoon
The news is incessant gloom and doom, so a Kannada TV channel decided to brighten up things a bit. Modi would rain money from helicopters, they announced. This inspired many villagers in the state to sit and wait outside, but the angel in the skies never materialised, nor did the cash cascade. The channel has now got a notice from the ministry of information and broadcasting demanding explanation for its bizarre reportage. Perhaps, it’s not malice, but plain stupidity to blame. After all, in economics, ‘helicopter money’ is a legit term, just like ‘yield curve control’ and ‘quantitative easing’. Too bad it doesn’t mean what it sounds like.
Chiku Of Their Eye
If Virat Kohli sounds too stiff a name to refer to the gregarious cricketer, worry not. He is also known as Chiku, which M.S. Dhoni often called him from behind the stumps, where mics picked up his secret and revealed it to the world. But why Chiku? Is it because Kohli is as seedy as his namesake fruit? Turns out in 2007, Kohli thought he was losing hair, so he got his hair cropped. His cheeks and ears stood out and immediately, a coach picked up on his resemblance to Chiku the rabbit from children’s magazine Champak. He might not look like a hare anymore, but considering Kohli’s recent vegan evangelism, what could be a more apt nickname than a fruit?
Typo To Hell
While the world wallows in lockdown-induced negativity, a man in Amroha was subjected to some unneeded positivity after his test results declared him ‘corona positive’. The 66-year-old was admitted to a hospital in Moradabad after he got a sore throat and fever, and his blood sample was sent to Aligarh. The test result was positive for coronavirus, sparking a scare that led to the quarantine of eight members of his family. But after the chief medical officer sought to confirm the report, the result was negative! So, the man and his family members were allowed to go home and exult in some much-needed negativity.
Banking On Embers
Asthi Kalash Bank in Kanpur does not deal in cash or credit. Its many lockers contain something even more precious—the ashes of the cremated, about 60 urns of them. “Many people want to immerse the remains of their loved ones in Allahabad, Varanasi or Haridwar, but are unable to go there due to the lockdown,” says Manoj Sengar. He established the bank in 2014 to preserve the remains of the dead until their relatives could conduct the final rituals. Tradition dictates that ashes of the dead cannot be kept at home and hence, the need for a bank.
The Unstoppables
A shot of the US flag in all its glory, followed by visuals of empty streets and doctors. And behind, croons Anuradha Palakurthi in a production reminiscent of yesteryear Bollywood numbers. The Indian-American singer released the song Rukta Hi Nahin (You never stop) as a tribute to the doctors fighting against COVID-19. Of the million doctors in the US, over eight per cent are of Indian origin even though they comprise one per cent of the country’s population. The track is inspired by the song Ruk Jaana Nahin from Imtihaan (1974).
Brevis
Illustrations: Saahil, Text by Alka Gupta and Saad Ahmed
