Moronic Wisdom
You begin your layman’s guide to Elections 1999 with the word "oxymoronic".If any ‘layman’ knows what it means, please call me.
Ajith A.T., on e-mail
Strictly Veggetarian
Green Evolution (31.7.1996)
I was surprised by the remark that Mallika Sarabhai was "one time a chicken-chewer" (Green Evolution, 31.7.96). Mallika has never been a non-vegetarian, though our family does eat eggs. There is no question of her "turning" veg. She has always been one.
Mrinalini Sarabhai, Ahmedabad
Articles of Unfaith
Cussin’ Trends (14.8.00)
After recording and condemning the glut in swearing among India’s population inCussin’ Trends (14.8.00), you have Naseeruddin Shah blithely using arse lick, kickbutt, bastard, etc, and sounding off with a middle finger in the next article.
Debangshu Saha, Manchester
Wizard of Words
Ulysses Revisited (3.8.98)
Rating Ulysses as the century’s best book (Ulysses Revisited, 3.8.98) reminds me ofJean Cocteau’s timeless quote: "The greatest masterpiece in literature is only adictionary out of order."
A. Krishna Pillai, Chennai
Encrypted!
Six Feet Under
I love cryptic crosswords (Six Feet Under, 13.9.99). I took up the challenge when a friendtold me Indira Gandhi could solve the toi cryptic in 45 minutes flat. And, like KhushwantSingh points out, we’re a motley group of friends who call up each other toask—‘What’s 8 across?’ So next time someone tells you ‘Go aheadand give money’ (7), just advance.
V.S Gopalarathnam, Chennai
Table of Discontent
Every week I look forward to your magazine to check if your table of contents tallies withthe articles inside. Every week I fail.
K.S. Ramesh, Courtallam, TN
Out of Date
Was He A Master? (5.7.99)
I am hardly surprised that Manjula Padmanabhan should find Mulk Raj Anand’s storiesdated (Was he a Master?, 5.7.99). The book she thinks is his latest (Lajwanti) was firstpublished 33 years ago.
Meenakshi Mukherjee, Delhi
Partying Affiliations
Apropos your report about my joining the bjp (Pollfinder, 13.9.99), you haven’t doneyour homework completely. How could you miss the fact that in addition to meeting the PM,his foster son-in-law Ranjan Bhattacharya, Yashwant Sinha, Jaswant Singh, Arun Jaitely,Shakti Sinha and N.K. Singh in my search for saffron-er pastures, I’ve also had teawith K.R. Malkani after a bbc recording, lunch with Arun Shourie at the Hyatt, tea withJagmohan at iic, joined by Madan Lal Khurana, and coffee with R. Kumaramangalam, apartfrom meeting K.C. Pant over lunch once a month.
Jairam Ramesh, New Delhi
Thoda sa Romani
Bahut khushi hui dekh kar ki aap ne Soniaji ki taqreer to Roman script mein chhapa(27.12.99). Agar Outlook mein ek safa hi is tarah chhapen to bahut achcha innovation hoga.Agar Hindustan ki sab zabanen Roman script mein likhi jaayen, to sab log angrezi se bhiwakif rahen. Mujhe yaad hai ke pehle army ke bahut se publications isi tarah publish hotethe.
Zafar Futehally, Bangalore
Photo-Copped!
The photograph accompanying the article To Find a Friend in an Enemy (9.11.98) isworth a thousand words! Comrades on the dais drinking Coca-Cola! What better way than thisto denounce liberalisation!
Akshay Kumar, Calcutta
Addressing the Issue
I write to protest the annoying practice of printing "by e-mail" instead of thetown/city/country in those cases where you receive letters to the editor via e-mail. Thatmore illustrious international magazines keep you company in this bumpkin practice issmall consolation. The locational co-ordinates provide an additional measure of insightinto whether the opinion is rural, small-town, metropolitan, or—save us!—non-resident in origin. This value is traded in for the completely inane pleasure of saying, "gee, by e-mail!" Why not more resounding announcement as ‘By Post!’, ‘By Courier!’, ‘By Fax!’...? Wake up for real to the cyber age.
N. Kalyan Raman, Mumbai
Break That Wasn’t
I was embarrassed to find the details of a holiday I supposedly took with a youngpolitician (Polscape, 1.5.00). The source was not revealed. The reporter’s prurientinterest in other people’s lives got him carried away. The only person who’staken me for holidays is my second son. I’ve no connection with the gentleman youmention. My lord (and lover) in this world is all-pervasive, like ether.
Kamala Soraiya nee Das, Kochi
The Search is On
Judging by the number of headlines hobbled by question marks (8) in your 9.10.96 issue,you seem to be groping for answers like us mere mortals.
M.P. Yeshwant Kumar, Bangalore
Telling Tale
All the hoo-ha over elections reminds me of Srilal Shukla’s Raag Darbari. Talking ofwomen defecating in the open, he said: "Vahan par unki besharam maujudgi Bharat kenav nirmataon par lanat bhej rahi thi, par iska pata un nirmataon ko nahin tha, kyonki veshayad us waqt apne ghar ke sabse chhote, par lakdak, kamre mein ek commode par baitheakhbar, kabziyat, videsh-gaman ki samasyaon par vichar kar rahe the (Their deplorablepresence visited shame on our nation-builders but they were blissfully unaware of it,sitting as they were on a commode and deliberating on newspapers, constipation and foreigntrips).
Rakesh Dubey, New Delhi
Bribing the Divine
I read that Rs 50 lakh, bundled in a cloth, was placed in a hundi (box) at the Tirupatitemple. Has any Indian cricketer been there recently?
Dr Ullas Hegde, Taiwan
Foreign Affairs
Flaunting one’s ‘irregular’ marital status seems to be in vogue. WhileI’ve no quarrel with the abilities of Hema Malini and Raja Reddy, conferring themwith the Padma awards seems to give official sanction to Hema’s ‘marriage’and Reddy’s ‘second wife’ syndrome.
Indrani Roy Misra, New Delhi
Mixed Trend
A picture in your magazine shows Uddhav Thackeray celebrating his 40th birthday with afour-tier wedding cake. Have I missed a trend?
Navanitha Shetty, Pune
Bar Code
As a designer I’m amazed that the proposed dress code for lawyers is western for menwhile an Indian option is offered for women (Dignity vs Discomfort, 12.6.96). If comfortand dignified looks is the issue, then nothing is more elegant than a kurta-set withsandals for men. A tie with the bar council logo smacks of colonial overtones and westernfeudal symbolism.
Wendell Rodricks, Goa
The Foul Language
No Fullstops for Hindi, (9.10.96)
Apropos Mark Tully’s decrying the prestige of English in India at the cost ofregional languages and Hindi (No Fullstops for Hindi, 9.10.96). It’s a culturaltragedy that the craze for English has created generations of Indians who are languageeunuchs who do not have adequate felicity either in their mother tongue or in a foreignlanguage, English.
Norma Louis, Mumbai
Invective in a Word
Hesitant Advice from an Old Friend, (24.7.00)
Vinod Mehta a "liberal" (Hesitant Advice from an Old Friend, 24.7.00)?Isn’t this the same guy who once claimed that he was the first to demand a ban on TheSatanic Verses? Gee, no wonder liberal is a dirty word in the US.
Sandeep H., on e-mail
Simply O-Struck
Katha of the Big O, Retold(20.3.00)
Sex is the last refuge of all failed journalism and your Katha of the Big O, Retold(20.3.00) indicates this.
Ashok Gupta, New Delhi
The Young Turk
Sex in the ’90s(11.9.96)
As I am still in my 50s, I haven’t read your cover story Sex in the ’90s(11.9.96).
C. Kesi, Chennai
Of Self-Governance
One Hell Of A State (11.10.99)
I augment my one measly hour of municipal water a day with costly tanker water. It’snot always potable, so I’ve a purifier. An inverter helps me tide over power cuts andpoor garbage collection forced us to begin our own vermiculture project. Why indeed do weneed a government (11.10.99)?
Sherna Gandhy, Pune
Minus the Ads
I’ve been counting the increase in the number of your ad pages. When it crosses 100,I stop subscribing.
Ashish Khokhar, New Delhi
Logarrhythms
Bharatpur Diary (13.4.98)
Apropos the logo in Bharatpur Diary (13.4.98). As far as I know, flamingos never come toBharatpur. The Siberian crane would’ve been more appropriate.
Poonam Kaul, Delhi
Your Calcutta Diary emblem—four cheerful fish—is something short of criminal.Sure, ilish maach is a subtle delicacy and the Bengalis’ weakness for fish islegendary, but Calcutta is much more than that. Tandoori chicken might reflect consumeristDelhi’s priorities but the more intellectual Calcutta’s sensibilities can be putacross better.
Dr Franto Francis, Tiruvalla, Kerala
I was appalled to see the logo in Delhi Diary depicting the Delhiite’s ostensiblestaple of tandoori chicken. The least you can do is show reverence towards and not mockthe hapless birds in death. As an opinion moulder you could promote compassion for livingcreatures enshrined in Article 51A (9g) of our Constitution.
Prasannashu, New Delhi
Wit that Bit
Bordello Tactics, (16.4.97)
Vinod Mehta’s reference to Gladstone’s efforts "to pick up fallenwomen" to save their souls (Bordello Tactics, 16.4.97) reminds me of an exchangebetween Gladstone and Disraeli, both of whom became Britain’s premiers. Gladstonetaunted: "Mr Disraeli, you will end your days either on the scaffold or by venerealdisease." To this Disraeli retorted: "That depends, Sir, on whether I embraceyour principles or your mistress."
C.B. Dyuthikar, Bangalore
Mom’s Not the Word
Nandana Dev Sen has famous parents in Amartya Sen and Nabaneeta Dev Sen. While introducingher in Glitterati (28.8.96), why exclude her mother? Do children have to depend solely ontheir father for their identity?
Sudeshna Roy, Calcutta
Indecent Exposure
Frankenstein Exposed (22.12.97)
The title Frankenstein Exposed (22.12.97) alludes to a monster. But the fictional DrFrankenstein who lent his name to the cliche was a good name and not a monster, whom heaccidentally created. Any allusion to a monstrous person or situation must be referred toas a Frankenstein’s monster, never as Frankenstein.
Ronnie Patel, Mirzapur
To State a Fact
Unlike J&K, Bihar is one state which should be granted autonomy to save India fromfurther humiliation.
Yasir Abbasi, New Delhi
Off the Mark
Shoeshineand Black Ink, (17.1.00)
Dear Sandipan, tsk, tsk. The Theory of Quotational Drift is at work again. The quote youattribute to Mark Mobius about shoeshine boys and the state of the stockmarket (Shoeshineand Black Ink, 17.1.00) was in fact J.P. Morgan’s. Some weeks before the Great Crash,Morgan was getting his shoes shined. The shoeshine boy, after finishing, asked him,"Any tips for the stockmarket, Mr Morgan?" Morgan went back to office, called uphis broker and sold his entire portfolio, saying, "When shoeshine boys start gettinginto the market, it’s time to get out."
Sandipan Deb replies: Nice try! But J.P. Morgan died 14 years before the Great Crash.
Anvar Alikhan, Mumbai
Missing Ring
In Pursuit of Prestige and Pleasure(5.3.97)
Your article on upwardly mobile domestic servants (In Pursuit of Prestige and Pleasure,5.3.97) reminded me of an incident when we had engaged a maid who was well-dressed, hadpleasing manners and was also a good worker. The only problem was that she was irregular.Once I lost my temper and told her she should inform me beforehand if she was not comingto work. Her retort? "How can I help that, didi? You people don’t even have aphone at home."
Latha Vanamali, Mumbai
